I'm not saying we should all get along, 'cause I for one don't want to live in a fascist society, but for crying out loud can't these flamers see that some of the things they say are actually not in the slightest bit clever and can actually be incredibly hurtful? Things like "It's because of people like you that I decided to write B/X stories for my own pleasure." which was a recent review of a fic on INAP. The person who left that review then went on to review every other story written by the poor soul they decided to target without actually referring to the story they were reviewing.
If I'd gotten a slew of reviews like that when I started writing fanfic I probably would never have published another fic to the web. I wouldn't have stopped writing, because to me that would be like stopping breathing, but I would have chosen the people I showed my stories to very carefully.
Xander authors are often disregarded in BtVS fic circles. He's not the most popular character to write for and tends to be overlooked a lot. Point in case - one of the awards sites Crimson Regret has been nominated for has it in the "In The Shadows" category for bit part characters. Why is it that we can't support one another? Why does it always have to descend into pointless personal attacks?
I'm an FXer. It's my ship of choice, but the fic I'm most proud of is a BX fic (What a Difference a Day Makes). The fic I find the most challenging to write is not a 'ship fic and is Scooby-centric rather than Xander-centric (Slayerless, not posted on LJ or ff.net yet). I have read Spuffy fics, I'm currently reading the slew of Spillow fics that seem to be over-taking the Spuffy ones in popularity even though I really dislike post Season 5 Spike, I read slash from time to time, I'll read pretty much anything so long as it's well written.
Just because I personally ship Faith/Xander doesn't mean I will jump on anyone who dares to write anything else.
I was going to go on, but I feel that I'll just be repeating what others have said better - liz_marcs' essay Stalking the Fanon Xander and m_mcgregor's essay I Don't Hate Buffy cover a lot of the points I would make so go read them if you haven't already.