April 29th, 2007

life begins - me

Whatever happened to Midge?

One of my earliest memories is pre-school of me and my friend Lucy sitting on the couch in my house teasing my dog that we were bumblebees and she couldn't catch us. (We were 3 or 4, it made sense at the time.)

My dog was called Midge, named after the otter in Ring of Bright Water. She was a beagle and she chewed the plaster off the kitchen walls. She was a sweetheart, I remember her, even though my mum had her first heart attack when I was five and the aftermath meant that we couldn't have a dog because my mum couldn't cope. I have pictures, I know she had a heart shaped liver-brown mark on her right back hip.

I remember loving Midge.

I don't know what happened to her. I have my sister's word for it that she was given back to the kennels from where my parents got her (I'm extrapolating from the knowledge I have that they got her either when my mum was pregnant with me or just after I was born. I know Midge was the same age as me.) but part of me wonders if I wasn't being fed a "we sent her to live on a farm where she had lots of fields to run around" line. She was five years old when she vanished from my life. I hope she got to live with another family, I hope she was allowed to live her life.

I think it's time.

It was October when Dram died. It still hurts. I still miss him with all my heart. But I think it's time I opened my home to another pet. And maybe my heart.