Hopefully I should have this part finished by tomorrow - it's definitely all there in my head so it really is just a matter of getting it on paper and hoping someone else (ie Bill) thinks it works as well!
I think it's a sign that I shouldn't be around people much when someone's voice just invokes this urge to kick her in the face until she stops talking. One of the girls in the department is... shall we say a bit of a stranger to tact, but not in an endearing way. Oh no, this female just delights in jumping into conversations and insulting people - seemingly unintentionally. She has an incredibly annoying voice as well and since she's standing about two foot from my desk I'm typing this so that I don't jump out of my seat and physically attack her. I think I may have some sociopathic tendancies...
Got into a little argument with the bitca boss a little while ago and smileawhile sent me this to cheer me up.
There is a factory which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arm. A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8.00. The next day at 0845 there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door. The Foreman from the assembly line throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule. The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up. At the end of the line stands the new employee surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches the woman. "I'm sorry," he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday"...... "Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles".