the girl who used to dance on fire and brimstone (whiskyinmind) wrote,
the girl who used to dance on fire and brimstone

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One day on

Yesterday's things I want to accomplish post? Let's see what a difference 24 hours have made:

1 - I want to not have an anxiety attack about going to my Nephew's birthday dinner tomorrow.
Not only am I not having an anxiety attack, I'm looking forward to it. My only worry is that on wrapping the presents I bought him I realised I have not bought him a 'toy' as such, he's almost as big a Star Wars and Doctor Who geek as I am so I have bought him a 'Spud trooper' (a Mister Potato Head with Imperial Stormtrooper paraphenalia) and the currently released 'vanilla' Doctor Who season two DVDs (vanilla as in they are just the episodes, no commentaries or extras). So, I'm going to take the afternoon off and go buy him a toy - I'm weighing up the options of a bumper pack of Lego and a remote controlled K-9. I think the former would be better for him but... I'll see when I get to the shop.

2 - I want to take Dram out every day without having those anxiety attacks when people say hello.
Dram got the stiches removed from his eye on Saturday and I took him back to the vet for a check up last night. Not only was I chatting to all the other people in the waiting room (including various school aged kids) but when we got out of the place there were three early-teen girls walking up the street who thought Dram was the cutest thing they'd ever seen. I stopped and spoke to them for quite a while without stammering, without wishing they would just leave me alone, without being anxious.

3 - I want to finish something I can be proud of. Whether that's writing, graphics, sites, or decorating another cake.
I wrote something yesterday which is not yet finished but which I still like this morning. I'm not quite there yet but...

5 - I want to stop complaining about work and actually do something positive about changing this, applying for new jobs, looking into proper business plans etc.
Yesterday I scoured the Guardian's job page and as a result applied for a copywriting job in Nottingham, I reactivated my profile on, I checked out, I am in the process of signing up to The jobs pages today aren't geared towards the kind of work I do - I don't think, I'll take a look anyway - but tomorrow's are.

The other two items on the list, well it's only been one day, I'll get there.

ETA I'm editing this with a little ramble. It's bin day in my village today, the lorries are usually just coming up my street as I leave for work (which works out pretty well because I can drag the wheelie bin out as I'm opening the gate). This morning they were running a little later (or I was early, haven't worked out which yet) and they were on the other side of the lights when I got there. The lights are fairly new, there's a bridge crossing the railway track on the road and it was kind of a blackspot so they narrowed the road down to one lane and put lights up to slow things down a bit. So anyway, the light was red for me as I pulled up and since I could see the bin lorry on the other side I stopped further back from the stop line than normal to let him pull into the driveway just at the lights on my side of the bridge. He pulled forward a little bit so that he was blocking the single lane and stopped there. My light changed to green but there was nowhere I could go so I sat there and watched someone pull up behind me. Bin lorry pulls forward into the driveway I mentioned and there would have been just enough room for me to get past him, if it hadn't been for the second bin lorry who drove through the red light on his side and tried to pass the first lorry as it was stopped.

I drive a Fiesta. It’s a little car. There was *barely* enough room for me to get past, there was no way in hell a bin lorry (that had just run the red light, don't forget) could get through there. So I'm sitting there, with another three cars pulled up behind me, a bin lorry to my right in the driveway and another one right in front of me gridlocked (and bloody lucky he hadn't actually hit me when he tried his insane overtaking the other lorry thing).

The only way any of us could get out of the mess was for me and the three cars behind me to reverse back up the street to let the idiot pass.

And when we finally did? Know what he shouted out of his cab window?

"Bloody women drivers!"

Oh how I wish I'd gotten his registration number...

Second edit: Voting's open over at doctorwholims here
Tags: brave new world outlook, mental health
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